We’d been dating about two months when my love printed me the first 3D gift he’d ever given me. I’ve received several over the last year but, the first was a vase. Together we picked through various designs and, this was the one I settled on. It was so unique and, I assumed the design must have taken forever to create. Red is one of my top three favorite colors *rainbow, being the first*.

I watched it in fascination while it was being printed. I have video clips on my phone. It warmed my heart to know we’d created this together.  I thought… still think, it’s lovely. The design is intricate and stable.

I kept this gift to myself for a couple of weeks and then decided I would take the vase and my raccoon on a photoshoot. When I post pictures of Vicent Cheese, he steals the limelight every time. But then something silly happened. I was bombarded with private messages from friends.

“Nice vagina vase”

“Do you see a vagina as well?”

“You picked out a vagina?! I didn’t think you swang that way.”

“Vaginn-na-na-na-na”

At first, I fought it. I dug my heels into the ground and stood tall. “It’s not a vagina vase! I don’t know how *that’s* what you took away from this beautiful moment. Perv!”

This, of course, this attitude only prompted more pokes from people closest to me. “Okay, Miranda. It’s not a vagina vase…Whatever you need to tell yourself.”

Last night I was taking photos. I was lying flat on my mattress, trying to capture an angle of something hanging above my bed. The view at which I gaze upon these flags. I raised my camera left and snapped this picture. It was a spur of the moment thought. When I played the image back to myself, I saw it. There, plain as day, was the vagina vase.

Fucking vagina vase.

Honestly, I laughed a lot.

Proudly on my bedside table, sits a vagina vase. My love made it for me and it makes me smile. In it, a solitary pink flower blooms forever.